The Pamphleteer

During colonial times in America, if you wanted to convince or inform people about some issue that you considered important, you went to the local printer and got some pamphlets printed. You then handed them out, read them to anybody that was interested, nailed them to the town bulletin board, or the nearest tree. The first amendment was specifically written to protect this type of activity and the writers or "pamphleteers".

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Sunday, August 22, 2004
 
MEMBER OF VILLAGE PEOPLE ADMITS HE IS GOVERNOR OF IDAHO

(From Pamela, our Bay Ridge correspondent.)

Band Members, Disco Fans Stunned

A member of the prominent disco band The Village People shocked fans and fellow
band members alike today by admitting at a press conference that he is actually
the Governor of Idaho.

The Indian Chief, a key member of the disco ensemble since its founding in the
1970's, choked back tears as he made his confession at a crowded press
conference in lower Manhattan.

"For some time now, I have been struggling with a truth about myself, but
now the time has come for me to share that truth with the world," the
Indian Chief said.

"I am the Governor of Idaho."

The Indian Chief's secret life as Governor of Idaho came as a total surprise
even to such fellow band-members as the Construction Worker, the Biker and the
Cowboy.

"In retrospect, he did seem to be signing a lot of papers all the time, but
I never would have guessed it was legislation," the Construction
Worker told reporters.

But moments after the Indian Chief's emotional press conference, angry fans
around the world were calling for his immediate resignation from the Village
People.

"I feel betrayed that a guy I thought was a full-time Village Person was
actually sneaking around being Governor of Idaho on the side," said David
Giulardi, 48, a fan of the band since the 1970's. "The credibility of the
Village People is at stake."

Elsewhere, President Bush announced that 70,000 troops withdrawn from Europe and
Asia would be used at the end of this month to keep protesters away from the
Republican National Convention.